I read an interesting article today entitled, Dan Savage: Monogamy destroys more families than it saves
. Even though the article came out in 2011, the ideas expressed about monogamy is still relevant today such as: society’s expectations and norms in regards to relationship, the need to be with somebody because we don’t want to be alone, the attraction we feel for someone because they are “new”. He even poses the idea that genetics are responsible for people’s lack of fidelity. Several writers have noted in the article, “As a species, we’ve evolved to be sexually responsive to novelty. From a genetic point of view, the lure of new partners (known to scientists as the Coolidge effect) combined with less responsiveness to the familiar (the Westermarck effect) motivated our ancestors to risk leaving their small hunter/gatherer societies to join other groups, thus avoiding incest and bringing crucial genetic vigor to future generations.” And the article observes that in order for couples to be monogamous they must be able to dedicate all their time and effort into staying faithful and be up to everything for their partner.
My question is how many of us believe that extramarital affair can actually help save a marriage and keep a family together? What would you constitute cheating? Would you want to know if your significant other is cheating on you? Would you tell your family or friends if their loved ones are cheating?