The Pumpkin Patch in Rhode Island

 

 

Farm grew more than just pumpkins but during fall season they are known for their pumpkin patch!

Yes you could take your kids to a local grocery store to pick a pumpkin but somehow it’s not as fun or exciting!

Many choices to pick from!

Fresh farm grown veggies!

WE love the hayride to the corn maze!

My daughter and her Aunt just enjoying the ride and conversation.

Wet got our clues for the corn maze puzzles!

I reminded my children of the movie, ” Children of the Corn!”

My daughter,Anora reading the first clue and trying to solve it to get to the next!

Memories! Lots of them! One of my favorite things to give my children is happy memories so that when they have children of their own they can say things like, ” Your grandma used to take us into the corn fields and try to scare the shit out of us by leaving us there!” In all honesty, I was the one who was scared that some insane killer from the movie, ” Children of the Corn” was going to pop out and grab me! My kids were laughing at me for being paranoid that some crazy person was going to do an reenactment of the movie! They were more focus on figuring out the clues to the corn maze so we can find our way out! With a minor help from and Eagle Scout who happened to be at the corn maze, we were able to figure out the clues and got out of the maze! Okay it may have taken us two hours but hey we got out and I didn’t get jumped by any deranged person or scare scrow! It’s nice to be out in nature and hang with your kids instead of sitting in front of the TV.

 

Two things you should never rush!

Two of life’s greatest pleasure is sex and food! Gael Greene said,”Great food is like great sex.  The more you have the more you want.” I have to agree with him. These are the two things in life we should never rush: making love and eating! These two things should not be timed because both nourishes your body. Like the say, ” Why rush a good thing?”

Turn the lights down low, pull the covers back, get set and go!:)

 

 

There is no Prince Charming so…

Recently Jennifer Lopez did an interview for InStyle magazine in which she  said, “I was waiting for Prince Charming. Everybody I met was going to be the guy I was going to spend my life with.” This comment reminded me of a conversation I had with my 17 year daughter a couple of months ago.

 

As a habit, we always sit in the car and talk after we get home from somewhere instead of going up to our apartment. Sometimes it’s because we are lazy or if there is a good song on the radio, we would say, ” Let’s sit for ten minutes or after this song then we will get down.” So on one of them nights, we were talking about her friends and how they were shock that she never had any types of relationship with anybody.

My daughter is 17, fixing to be 18 in February and has never had a boyfriend. In this day and age that is very RARE indeed. It’s not that she doesn’t want one or she’s holding out for her Prince Charming. And there has been plenty of guys who have liked her but either it was the wrong timing or the feeling wasn’t mutual. So as she was telling me about her how most of her friends already had sex or some type of fling or dating experience, I was thinking to myself, ” Thank God she hasn’t done none of those things because I am not ready to deal with that shit!” Before I even finished that thought she said, ” Mom I don’t think mothers should raise their daughters on the false promise that a Knight in Shining Armor or Prince Charming is going to show up one day and give them a happily ever after.” I cautiously asked her, ” You don’t believe in a fairy tale ending or believe in true love?” She replied, ” I believe in living in the moment and not think about what’s going to happen or if the relationship is going to last. Maybe the person that we are at this moment may not need anything more than just what we get or have with that person. Maybe down the road they may not be who we want or need and that’s okay.”  I nodded my head slowly while reflecting on my own beliefs and said cautiously ” I know what you are saying and I agree to a certain extent but I still believe in a happily ever after.” My daughter laughs at my typical and romantic response and says, ” Well, either there are no Prince Charming or mine got lost in the woods or got too lazy to find me so…”

Don’t be a lousy Lao person!

Traditional Lao dress, “Sinh”

You know what annoys me the most about  some Laotian women is when they make contradictory statements like, ” I am a traditional Lao woman” or “Have respect for our culture and not show off your body” but then they themselves proceed to post pics of themselves frolicking in a string bikini on the beach or pouting pics of themselves that pretty much says, ” Come get me.” I think that is being very hypercritical of other Laotian women who may not wear sinh everyday or traditional Lao clothes. You can’t lecture people about having pride in being a traditional Laotian woman while posting half naked pics of yourself on Facebook or other social media.

*** This picture was taken last year when my friend, pictured here, and I went to the public library in Providence to tell other people about Lao textile and give young kids the opportunity to try out some traditional clothes.

Besides, what does being a traditional Laotian woman mean anymore? Does that mean you sit at home cooking, cleaning, and obeying your husband? Well, some of us can’t afford to that that anymore, especially us, single mothers who has to work to feed and clothe our children.

And furthermore, what does being proud of your culture mean? Does it mean you have you walk around wearing sinh everyday?  Does it mean eating Lao food all the time?  Do people even know what Lao and proud mean?  We can’t tell other people,” Don’t be a lousy Lao person” when we are not perfect ourselves. Why don’t we try to just be a good human being everyday?

My friend, the president of LCC and my daughter, Anora  who is half Spanish and half Lao. We do our part in telling other people about our culture and ethnicity but we also are proud to be Americans.

 

Get to the point!

According to the article,The Scientific Flaws of Online Dating Sites, in Scientific America: “Every day, millions of single adults, worldwide, visit an online dating site.The industry—eHarmony, Match, OkCupid, and a thousand other online dating sites—wants singles and the general public to believe that seeking a partner through their site is not just an alternative way to traditional venues for finding a partner, but a superior way. Is it?” This is a good question to think about. Online dating is one of the most popular way of finding someone but is it really the most effective way? I know many people who have used some of these sites and their feelings has been mixed. One young lady said, ” Many guys say that they want a relationship on their profile but when you meet them, they really don’t. They are grown men playing games and not really looking for anything serious.” To be fair that is just one person’s opinion. Another friend had a better experience. She said, ” I like Match.com and have met some nice men whom I have gone out for coffee and dinner with and that’s it. I like not having to commit more than I am willing to give.”

The bottom line is there are many dating sites out there that fits your level of interest. I guess you just have to take a chance to find an honest person who gets to the point and tells you exactly what they want. Because of the increase in online dating, does that mean we are more desperate, more lazy or just smarter? What’s more effective? Online or traditional?

Are men’s magazine to blame for men’s obsession with the perfect woman?

One of the most popular men’s magazine is Men’s Health. It offers a variety of tips and advice on things we men and women are obsessed about such as: Fitness, Sex & Woman, Health, Nutrition, Weight Loss, Style and much more.I have to admit I even read this magazine and I’m pretty certain that many women read it as well. Obviously this magazine’s main objective is to cater to men and their interest. With article title such as, “The Sexiest Models in Men’s Health History”, it is no wonder that the online magazine gets a heavy amount of traffic. I even look to see who are these hot women and judge for myself if they are the sexy. I have to admit the women they picked are beautiful but also most of them are blond “bombshells”. I didn’t see any Asians, African Americans or any other noticeable ethnicity. This baffles me because I know there are tons of gorgeous ethnic women out there but yet they didn’t even feature one? I can’t really say I’m surprised by this lack of diversity because in most magazines the idea of beauty or what is sexy that is perpetrated seem to be the all “American girl” which equates to blonds with long legs, perfect body, long hair and big boobs. Before anybody gets mad, I’m not racist or a hater but this is just my observation. Also, I have to admit there are more magazines now today that features racially diverse models than a couple of years ago. However, the question I have is: Are men’s magazine to blame for men’s obsession with the perfect woman? Are men obsessed with blondes because that is mostly what are in the men’s magazine? Do men even care that the pictures are photo shopped, alter or modify to create these “perfect” images for their viewing pleasure? Is that why there is a rise in plastic surgery because women feel that they have to be perfect like these photo shopped women? What form’s a young man’s or young woman’s concept of beauty? Are magazines to blame for their unrealistic perception of beauty?

For those of you interested in seeing the photos of the sexiest women in “Men’s Health” here is the link: Men’s Health Magazine

If you want to see some samples of pictures of celebrities and models before and after photoshop, go to:

How to make a woman happy

When it comes to making a woman happy, it is so simple that I don’t understand why some men still say that they don’t understand what a woman wants. If a man is interested in pleasing a woman he should: make her feel loved, desired, and accepted and she will pretty much do what you want. Don’t put a condition on these three things like, ” I love you but, or I think you hot but or I accept you the way you are but…” Don’t ever use that conjunction “but” when you are telling a woman those things because then you are making your love conditional. Most of the woman I have talked to say that they left their husband or cheated because they did not feel loved, desired or accepted by their man. For example, “Mary” a 53 year old divorcee I met in the summer told me that when she was married to her husband of 19 years, he never made her feel beautiful or appreciated. She said she never remember him telling her she looked pretty or nice or that he even noticed when she dressed up. As a result, the last three years of their marriage, she slept on the couch and didn’t want to have sex with him because he didn’t make her feel loved or desired. After she divorced him she had a hot love affair with a 26 year old who made her feel beautiful and desired even though she was a little overweight. Because of the attention he was giving her when she was overweight she wanted to look good for him and started exercising and taking better care of herself. She said, ” I couldn’t believe this hot young guy was telling me he thought I was beautiful and actually showed me every time he touched me. He didn’t care about my weight. He made me feel desired for the first time in my life. At first I thought he was faking it but then I realize that there were some men out there who really didn’t care about my size.”

Mary is not the only woman who have told me that they are willing to do anything for men who made them feel loved and desired. Another lady who is having an affair said, ” I got tired of telling my husband what I wanted. After so many years of being ignored and emotionally neglected, I stop trying to get his attention. Instead I gave in to a man who is not afraid to tell me he loved me or desired me or want to be with me. I know it’s wrong but I can’t help myself. Life is too short to not live it the way we want.”

Words are very powerful. Telling a woman she is beautiful and making her feel it can make a difference. Most woman knows when a man is lying by the way he expresses his feelings about her and by the way he touches her. So don’t fake it. We are not stupid. A man can make a woman and keep a woman happy when he shows her he loves, desires and accepts her unconditionally.

Love is blind

I wrote this poem about a week or two ago in the middle of the night because I couldn’t sleep.Today when I was watching the show, “Scandal” I thought about how this poem is fitting for the episode I was watching which is about forbidden love. I call any relationship with a taken or married person, forbidden love according to the rules or norm of society. In the episode, one of the main character said something along the line of,” I was a coward not to wait for you to come along.” He is basically telling her that she is his soul mate and he regretted not “waiting” for her. He in a sense has given up on his dream girl because he didn’t think she existed. After he is married and has kids, his soul mate shows up but he is obligated to stay in his relationship. What would you do if you found your “soul mate” but they were already taken? How long would you wait for the right person? Do people settle for the next best thing because they think they will never find their ideal mate? I think as we get older and wiser, this matter of love gets more complicated and not easier. It’s not a simple matter of black or white, right or wrong. I wrote this poem to express the complication of love.

Love is blind
to reason
to morals
to time,
to anything except bringing two lost soul mates together.

Love is magical
it’s the one beautiful illusion we all fall for,
where there’s no room for logic or reason
just emotions, connections, and passion
consuming us like wildfire coursing through our veins.

Love is what we pray for, live for,
fight for, and die for.
It is the fairytale we secretly believe in.

Why are there so many men seeking younger girls for relationships?

Lately, I have seen a rise in Laotian older men dating younger girls and even marrying them. One of these older men is my grandma’s brother who went back to Laos to get a wife. She is in her twenties and he is in his sixties. Even though he doesn’t look like his age, I still find their relationship uncomfortable and awkward to accept. Maybe one of the reason is that she is half my age.

My grandma’s brother is not the first case of Laotian men going back to the village to find a wife. I just find it interesting that they can’t find a women here in the U.S. or want one from here. Many men and women have told me one of the reason why so many Laotian men are flocking back to the motherland for a spouse is because the Laotian women here has become too Americanized. Also many Laotian women are no longer content with being a traditional housewife whereas a woman from the village would be happy with a simple life. Of course this is all a matter of opinion.

Besides Laotian men I have heard about many stories of American men going to Asian countries to find wives. I find it sad and disturbing that they have to resort this to find a wife. I find it hard to believe that these young girls are in love with these old men! Maybe I’m fickle but I think they are being used by girls for money and or a Visa. Why would all these men go through the trouble for finding love in a foreign country? Do they think these girls are innocent and would love them for themselves? I truly feel sorry for them because they are so desperate for love that they would resort to this.

If you are interested in seeing more about this subject, watch the trailer. According to Youtube description, “Seeking Asian Female” is an eccentric modern love story about Steven and Sandy—an aging white man with “yellow fever” who is obsessed with marrying any Asian woman, and the young Chinese bride he finds online.

Global We Got Married

In May my friend introduced me to the popular Korean show, “Global We Got Married”. “In this global spin-off of the wildly popular ‘We Got Married’, it becomes a meeting of cultures as celebrities from different countries are coupled together and work through their reality-TV marriage.” The couple that I found myself attached to is Ok Taec Yeon
(Korean pop star from the group 2PM) and Wu Ying Jie (popular Taiwanese actress and singer). Even though I knew the show was scripted to a certain extent and that their marriage was “fake”, I couldn’t help but find myself wishing their make-believe union was real. It was not long before I suspended my disbelief and pretended that these two individuals were really a couple. Maybe it’s because they have such a good connection/chemistry that it’s difficult to believe that they are faking it for the show. I along with many fans, expressed our sorrow when the show ended with the tearful parting of these love birds in episode 15. We all wanted the show to continue and found ourselves creating a petition to pressure the creators of the show to give us more episodes.

Based on my own personal experience and observation of other fans, I have concluded that we are obsessed with this show because it depicts the type of romance/love that we want or crave. Secretively I’m sure many of us girls/woman want a man who is humorous, kind, sweet, silly, considerate and goofy like Taec. The relationship that is depicted in the show is sweet and romantic. It is no wonder that so many people became attached to this couple and want their marriage to be real. The “married couple” had great chemistry and that translated quite well onscreen. Ergo, we romantic girls at heart, aspire to find a love like that. Yes, some of us still believe in fairy tales and happily ever after.

If you would like to watch the show here is the link: http://www.dramafever.com/drama/4268/1/We_Got_Married_-_Global_Edition/?ap=1